Homesick

Every once in a while I get homesick. I used to say it wasn’t the country I missed, just the people in it, my mother, my brother, my sisters, their children, and the friends I left behind. But more so lately, I’m missing the country as well. I miss simple things like walking to the corner store, or to the doctors office, getting the train or riding the bus home from town on a wet and windy day.

I miss the architecture, the cobble stone streets, the old cathedrals and the sprawling green countryside, dotted with ancient artifacts. I miss the seaside towns with their old carousels and piers lined with visitors holding their raincoats close to their bodies, but still enjoying their 99’s with flakes and strawberry sauce!

I don’t think I’ll ever live in England again, but I’ll enjoy every visit. I’ll go wherever Curtis goes for work, and England sadly pays their fire fighters pennies, the public servants in general, are treated pretty poorly in comparison to here. Wherever I am with Curtis and the kids, I’m home.

 

And just like that…

I have a four year old.

The brightest, shiniest thing that has happened recently, has been my son’s fourth birthday! I swear I can still smell that familiar yet fading scent of newborn baby when I pull him in close for a hug.

He had a laid back birthday celebration this year. A class party that I made cupcakes for, a new bike from Curtis and I and an afternoon of playing with Mia and his cousins before a visit to Curtis’ parents. 

Calvin has grown so much this past year, both physically and intellectually. He has a keen interest in the universe as a whole, from the planets of the solar system, to questioning the creation and exploration of the tiniest pill bug here on earth. He loves to ask questions, and to give answers he has learnt from exploring and reading. He has a smashing sense of humor, with his favorite joke being “What kind of dog has no tail? A hot dog!”. And he brightens the gloomiest of days with his love and compassion.

Deflated

I haven’t been posting a lot lately, because honestly, I’ve been in quite the negative slump for a while. I don’t always want to write about my problems, my negative attitude and frankly my lack of self love. I wish I had something positive to write at the moment, something truly bright and maybe even uplifting.
I could use some lifting up, myself. 

Whole 30

I started Whole 30 yesterday with my neighbor Molly. We agreed to encourage each other, to check in daily and to cook for one another to keep us on track. I’m one day in and two pounds down (and yes I know I shouldn’t be weighing myself). I’m hoping that with the addition of no dairy and no sugar along with what is my already clean eating diet, I can start seeing real results.

I’m sorry if you are reading this and thinking “Another weight loss post!?”, but this is where I’m at right now. I have a goal in mind and I will achieve it. I’m coming up on my 30th year and I’m not going to enter it with feeling so negatively about myself.