On a lighter note…

Rain is due in the next few days and I am looking forward to it! Rainy days mean cuddles on the couch with the kids, playing in the muddy back garden and doing crafts in the dimly lit dining room whilst listening to the pitter patter of the drops.

Rain is a rare in Fresno, but so common at home in England. It’s weather that can make my heart feel heavy and light simultaneously. I love it.

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News

I haven’t paid much attention to the news lately. When I do, I see so much pain, so much sadness. And, I suppose it has always been there, it will always be there, but right now it seems magnified. I try to pay attention only to the positive stories, the little glimmers of hope, of love…

Maybe I am the ostrich, with my head buried deep in the sand, wanting not to see the world in it’s grey and tarnished state. I want to see the world perhaps, through rose tinted glasses, as a child sees it.

I know Calvin and Mia only see love around them. I know that they have no concept of the hate of other human beings, or the atrocities committed in the names of so many. But I also know that a four year old understands strong dislike, they understand the idea that someone can be a bully, that bad behavior can hurt more than just someones heart. Isn’t that just a little bit terrifying?

I want to shelter them from the news, from hearing about the pain of the world and the people in it. I want to shelter my own heart and mind, pouring all of my love, all of my positivity into my family. So whilst the negative sometimes slips through the cracks, and I choose to read the occasional news story, to keep current, to know what it out there, I will continue to seek the positive. I will seek the love and the light.

Food For Thought

It really didn’t occur to me before becoming a parent, just how much women tear each other down. I mean, I turn on the laptop or look at my phone and I’m bombarded with articles about the right way to parent, about how motherhood is meant to look and often starting with the dreaded “Dear mom…”. It’s not okay.

Parenting and motherhood are individual experiences. One persons norm, can be completely and utterly different to another persons. So why do we insist on writing articles that tear each other down? Shouldn’t we be creating the “village”? We should be building one another up, being a compassionate and understanding ear to one another when shit gets real. Because motherhood is hard and if you think it’s not, well, as Amy Poehler says “Good for her! Not for me”.

I’ve been torn down by other women, first hand. Grown women passing judgement on someone they know nothing about in order to what? Feel better about themselves? Elevate themselves above the women they are treating so negatively? No. Not for me.

In the same brush stroke, these same women are the ones not only targeting other mothers, but women in general. They fit shame, fat shame, body shame etc. Mind your own business. Be mindful of yourself. And please, don’t sugar coat your objectification and judgment and label it as being “concerned”.

You might be thinking that by writing this, I’m judging these women, and in turn, I’m doing exactly what they are. And I’d challenge you in that I am not tearing these women down, they’ve already lowered themselves to a point that I hope, they can elevate themselves from. I won’t stand idly by and watch others treat anyone with so much disdain, parents, women and men.

I leave you with this quote, some food for thought so to speak.

“You don’t have to knock anyone off their game to win yours. It doesn’t build you up to tear others down.” – Mandy Hale

Change 

There are dishes in the sink, plates on the table and laundry to be done. But they can all wait. For the first time in a while, today I felt like I was just relaxing with the kids. We visited the zoo together, something we haven’t done very much in the past, but with new memberships, I hope we can do more of in the future. We set out bright and early and enjoyed the warmth of the first signs of spring as we toured the new African Adventure exhibit at Fresno Chaffee Zoo. I pulled the kids in the wagon whilst they looked at the animals, snacked and enjoyed the ride. 

  We got up close with some cheetahs which I think was a highlight for myself and the kids.

Calvin and Mia both fed the giraffes and giggled their heads off when the long tongues grabbed the lettuce leaves.
 Mia was mesmerized by the sea lions and Calvin loved feeling the sting rays drift past his fingertips at Stingray Bay. 

 

Today’s outing was a welcome break! We moved out of our house last week and into our little apartment that we will reside in until the limbo of having a new house to move into is over. It’s been a whirlwind of moving everything into our temporary home and into storage whilst Curtis has juggled work and I’ve juggled the kids. Luckily we have had some amazing friends and family to help.

I needed today. The kids needed today. Everything else can wait. We are busy making memories!